I sit on the toilet. Orion makes a grab for my undies.
"Nope. You do not want to do that."
I hop up waddle to my cabinet, reach in for a pad.
"See, I often forget I get my period. Really sometimes I don't think I even should have it."
I sit back down.
"This is the reason you had to get neutered. So you wouldn't make any other little girl doggies pregnant. Although rumor has it, when you are pregnant, at least for humans, you don't have to have your period. I bet a girl doggie would like to skip the whole process too. It's a shame there are so many strings attached with that one." I pause, thinking this over, would a girl dog be bothered much? Thoughts drift in of Tessa, our Sharpei and her modified undies, with a pad and a hole cut for her tail while she was in heat. How long are girl dogs prego for? Brain drifts back to humans.
"Yeah. I doubt I'll be getting prego in my existence but I do like the idea of a natural reprieve." I stick the pad down. Hand him the wrapper to shred. "I appreciate the offer for help, but like most things here in the bathroom, I'm pretty confident I can handle them."
Orion wanders off to grab a pair of undies I may have dropped on the floor this morning.
"Remember I told you those are not good for you? Orion, everything I tell you is for educational reasons. I'm helping you catch up to my 27 years worth of wisdom."
He ignores me and continues on his way down the hall.